it is 11:56pm on Christmas Eve

the presents are out...

Santa has been here and eaten his cookies...

and I can't get my mom off our brand new Wii...

HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE

So we Fought....over Ground Turkey

So we fought …over ground turkey

I freely admit I am a control freak – I like doing things my way…and since I like having them done my way I usually just go ahead and do them so I know that it will get done and well get done the way I like.

I had an event to attend yesterday, which would not leave me time to do my usual Sunday morning foray to the grocery store…TC told me he would be more than happy to go to the store for me..

Uhhh OK…

So I wrote out a list and then I re-wrote in order of the store working from right to left…and then we had a discussion about said list…

While going over the list I had Ground Turkey on the list for chili…

We proceeded to have a conversation that went something like this

ME: I want ground turkey for Chili so make sure you get the plain ground for the Chili and NOT the Italian style ground turkey

TC: Ok

ME: Also get an eggplant too IF they look good – oh hold a second to make eggplant takes a bit of time…I know why don’t we have Turkey Loaf this week

TC: Ok

ME: So go ahead and get a pack of Ground Italian style turkey too {add Ground Italian next to plain ground turkey on list} – so get a pack of both…if they don’t have the Italian style just get two things of plain – but try and see if they have the Italian

TC: OK

I am pretty sure this is the conversation that took place in TC's head

ME: maa maa maa maa Plain Ground Turkey maa maa maa (stop to take a breath)

TC: OK

ME: maa maaa maa maa Italian style turkey maa maa maa (stop to take a breath)

TC: OK

ME: maa maaa maaa Ground Italian style maa maaa maa Italian (stop to take a breath)

TC: OK

So I go to my event and come home…I go to get the ground turkey out so I can start to make the chili…

Open the fridge

1 pack of Italian style ground turkey – hummmm

So I go and ask TC “Where is the plain turkey”

TC response was “You didn’t ask for Plain turkey”

Ummmm WTF….really….

So I got angry…and was a bit yelly over ground turkey….he proceeded to tell me I had only asked for Italian turkey and he went by the list – which he proceeded to get out of his jacket pocket and show me…

the list

where it was written

Plain ground turkey (not Italian – 4 chili) & Italian turkey

Then he started ranting about how I was a control freak and he made a mistake and simply forgot…

I ended up leaving the house because I was pissed off…

See this is where men and women differ – he thought I was upset that he simply “forgot” the stupid turkey…I could have cared less if he in fact truly “just forgot”

I was upset because he didn’t listen…I mean we had a whole freakin conversation about the stupid turkey…about what we were using it for and what we had planned for the week…and yet…

After 10 years of marriage I should be used to it…but I guess that is what marriage is…sometimes there are yelly parts…over ground turkey….

Bad X-mas?!?

So LOTTA had a contest the other week asking about what the worst X-mas you ever had was...

I do have to say I haven't really had a BAD christmas -

I mean I have had some sad christmas's - like 2 years ago when my brother was killed in a car accident a week before the holidays...we managed to muddle through like my family usually does - since my brother was cremated my parents brought him along for Christmas Day...we put his favorite Day-Glo orange "Git'r Done" hat on his urn and put him up on the shelf by the tree...

To other families this might seem weird or crazy...this was my families way of coping...I know it explains a lot about me...

The year before that my sisters dog escaped from my parents house and was struck and killed by a caron Christmas Eve...that was a pretty sad Christmas too...

But the Worst one I have to say was the year when I was about 10 years old and I received a Dickie...

a white cotton turtleneck Dickie...don't be jealous ya'll

It was given to me by my grandmother and I still remember the tag

"HO HO HO - here's a dickie just for you..."

Seriously - what the hell did I do wrong that year...I thought I was a pretty good kid...but a Dickie that is worse than an orange and a bag of gold coins...hell I would have taken the Lifesaver Holiday storybook over a dickie...

Of course I am older now...and have moved on...

YEAH RIGHT...a freakin dickie

Postman - you are going to make me go postal...

So I have been waiting for a CD of pictures that my sister sent me... see it is part of another gift that i need to complete and mail out to the recipient so I need that CD...like 6 days ago

She mailed it last week and assured me that I should have it by Friday - Saturday at the latest...Friday came and went...I was out all day Saturday and arrived home to find a Ransom note in my mailbox

The CD is being held hostage by the US Postal Service...in order to Free the CD I have to pay .16 cents...

YES - they are holding my CD hostage for 16 lousy cents...

This is the first time they have actually held something for thier postal Ransom...in the past when I have had items arrive with postage due they simple put an envelope in my mailbox with the amount due...I put the money in the envelope and stick it back into my mailbox and everyone is happy.

NOW - momma ain't happy...

What happened?

I thought we had a beautiful relationship - one even bumped up a notch when we created a whole new paved driveway - far wider than our old one, smoothly paved with a parking pad...I know you use my driveway to turn your little mail trucks around and go back down the street...I have even seen you use my driveway as a "pow-wow" spot since you can fit 2 trucks across with room to spare...

And come on - you know I am good for the money...don't you see all the magazines and catalogs I receive in the mail... and you know the Santa and reindeer Poker playing inflatable just screams high class...

So today I have to trudge to the post office, pay my ransom to get my CD...then trudge back AGAIN later this week to mail the present that I needed the CD for...

BAAAAA HUMBUG....

ON A LIGHTER NOTE...

About 2 weeks ago I got my hair cut - being that i trust my hairdresser I told her - I want something fun and funky and easy to maintain - so she got out her scissors and a razor and went to town...and I liked the look...

when I actually have time to do it up right it sort of looks like Lisa Rinna's...of course to really look like hers I need the awesome Jonathan DIRT...but at $23 for a small bottle...well...

The other day I was rushing around and trying to get out the door with the wee ones when TW looked and me and exclaimed

"MOMMY - you look just like Troy"

Yes because I was so going for the Zac Efron look...well at least he is pretty - does that make me pretty...

Now if you put Zac's hair on Nikki Blonsky there to the left of him - then you would have a more accurate reflection of myself...only my boobs aren't as big...

All I DON'T want for Christmas

a Va-Jay-Jay pillow

Hummm I'll have to ask TC if I have roses "down there"

Enough said...

All I want for Christmas is...

well judging by my SPAM folder it must be a Penis Enlargement...

Yep - every day for the past week I have been recieving offers like this


Dr. Janna Blackman - ‎Christmas discount on penis enlargement.


Dr. Gina Hinkle - ‎Penis enlargement Christmas offer

I don't know about you...but I seem to be pretty happy with MY own personal penis size...

Maybe they have gift certificates...you know wouldn't that be a boost to your significant others self esteem...a gift certificate for a penis enlargement...

"But honey....it was on sale and I had a coupon"

More Elfin' going on

Your Elf Name Is...

Giggles Slave O' Santa

What's" Your Elf Name?

I am betting at this time - TC is seriously contemplating about legally changing his name to Santa