Thursday, April 06, 2006

Scooping out my eyeballs...

Ah yes spring is here…sort of…

And what does that mean – flubber and spandex.

Seriously – being a bigger gal myself I know it how hard it is to find clothes that properly fit – I apparently am among the minority of bigger gals that actually have their clothes fit properly and not so tightly that it shows all the rolls and bumps.

Now I know us bigger gals aren’t always to blame – there is the clothing manufactures themselves – the ones who think that just because a garment is made of say 3% spandex that they can make the overall garment a little smaller because it will “stretch”

Even spandex has a breaking point…

So anyway many gals SQUEEZE themselves into shirts that are too tight, pants that are too tight, dresses that are too tight…and then go out in public…and many times I wish..just wish I always carried a spoon on me so I could scoop my eyeballs out rather than see flesh being squeezed out of the tops of jeans or som poor shirt stretch to the limit over major valleys and bumps of flesh. I mean come on if you put on a pair of jeans and you have to pull your flubber up over the band to zip them up BUY THE NEXT SIZE….just because you buy a size 12 doesn’t MAKE you a size 12.

I myself have a nice piece of “twin skin” belly pouch around my middle and I always make sure that puppy is covered up – I don’t want to see and I am sure other people don’t either…I don’t understand why others don’t see the world the way I do.

But the worst…far worse than any hanging out flubber has to be the dreaded…the nasty…

Cameltoe…

You all know what I am talking about…

I mean seriously do some women just not own a mirror…

Even taking away the visual – how do you not feel it – I mean everyone has had a wedgie…and it is not comfortable I can’t even imagine how a front wedgie feels…ALL DAY.

So remember gals just because Tommy Hilfiger makes a spandex miniskirt in a Size 24 doesn’t mean it should be worn…

Thank you and please hand me my spoon…

1 comment:

Builder Mama said...

OMG, I have to say that camel toe is my biggest fear. I am constantly checking over and over again in mirrors to make sure everything is OK.

Don't they call that flubber over the top of your pants waistline "muffin tops"? Ick. Cover that shit up.