Need a young lad with good hands...

get yer mind out of the gutter...

I have a problem - the problem is that I am stuck...

Stuck in what you say - a funk...no - the mud...no - a rut....no

I am freakin stuck on Raving Rabbid -


I mean it was bad enough when I couldn't drown the little suckers with carrot juice fast enough.


Heck that took me a good 75 minutes to finally drown the suckers to move on...

and don't even get me started about trying to slam the doors - that one was well over the 2 hour mark...stupid bunnies



But riding the stupid warthogs are doing me in - I spent an HOUR last night trying to ride them - Oh I can ride but just not fast enough - you have to do it in 1:45 - the lowest I got was just under the 2 minute mark... and this was not the first time I have tried...no more like the 4th or 5th time...



and the thing is I can't move on until I ride the stupid warthogs...so I am destined to repeated the same games in a Groundhog Day motion again and again (although the level I am stuck on I get to beat the stuffing out of a Rabbid with a hammer...gets the frustrations out) until one day I either ride the stupid warthog within the time or I get so frustrated the Raving Rabbid gets run over multiple times...

At this point I am not above cheating...be it finding some cheat codes on-line or paying some young lad with nimble fingers to ride my warthog :)

let my mistake help you...

if perhaps you have a new cell phone - and let's just say you experiment with some different rings tones...and let's just go a little further and say you have choosen "Baby got Back" as your new ring tone...

If you are sitting in church doing a reconciliation (you Catholics will know what I'm talking about) project it is best and actually wise to either change your ring tone - or best yet - mute the sucker...

Nothing like a moment of silent prayer interrupted by "I like big butts and I can not lie..."

I sooooooo wanted to say - "well maybe God likes a little junk in the trunk..." but I wisely bit my lip

Caught up in the FACEBOOK web...

So a number of weeks ago I jumped on the Facebook bandwagon...it has been great to find out what people have been up to since high school and college. Some things have been very surprising to learn.

The thing is someone (Scott or Shar I can't think who started it) started putting up old pictures from college...and it spured many of us on to post our own old pictures and with it came back lots and lots of memories - especially fun when you don't even remember the situation.

So I have put up some of my own old pictures and went looking the other night for more and learned two things

• The digital revolution is a wonderful thing...I have a ton of pictures where it is too dark or too blurry or someone turned at the wrong moment - or best yet pictures of the same thing taken multiple times in order to get the picture "right". Although looking back at some of the times I had in college I am thinking while gladd for the digital revolution...very glad it wasn't around during my college days...by the time things got too freaky or wacked I was usually out of film...

• Really what the hell was up with my style...some pictures from 15 years ago I look great (and those are definately the ones I am posting to FB) - but some pictures...some pictures it looks like a band of New Jersians held me down and styled my hair while the Before pictures from "What Not to Wear" threw up on my body...big hair and bad clothes...that was my 1990's

i'mmmmmmmmm BACK!!!!!

yes it is me....arisen from the pile of sawdust and scraps that the renovation has provided and slowly things are coming together.

The last little bit of the kitchen renovation is almost done...just 3 more things need to be done

• Panel addition on the end of one of the cabinets
• cutlary drawer installed (cabinet didn't arrive with it as ordered)
• fix the kitchen faucet

That last one - fix the kitchen faucet - well this is our 2nd faucet we have - the first one didn't work - well it worked but for some reason you could only get either hot or cold water out of it - depending on which way you switched the hoses - after my contractor placed calls to a plumbing place, a plumber and to Koehler directly the outcome was we got a bum faucet and to take it back to where we bought it - so we did and I ordered a Mac-Daddy Delta faucet from on-line...

Got it - installed it - hot water, cold water, warm water....that's all good...what is bad is that it has no pressure...the water dribbles out - so my contractor is suppose to bring over a master plumber to take a look at it...this doens't surprise me - as we have also already had 2 visits from the from the GE repairman for our brand new fridge...stupid icemaker....and the fancy instahot I wanted - damn tank didn't fit under my sink - so we had to go to the basic shiny chrome and black plastic model...

one day....one day everything will be in proper working order - but I must admit the renovation is spectacular and I look forward to using my new kitchen and my new 3 seasons room for YEARS to come...

Want to take a peek - then just click HERE

still alive...

some of you have my e-mail address and for the second time in a week I received an e-mail asking if I am alive...

I am - just buried under the house renovations - yeah...that promise to never paint again...I spent 3 hours last night painting my laundry room a color called Junebug...wrong name for the paint it should really be "1986 Neon Green Hue # 3" - oh well at least I will be able to see what I am doing by the glow of the walls

Renovations are going along great - I should have some pictures posted by the end of the week.

Work training....let's just say if you ever have any desire to learn about the Radial tire and how it came to be - ask me and prepare to be bored....

oh and one of my friends sent me a link to join Facebook - so I did...bad bad bad decision...another thing to waste time on....

gotta go and read more about tires...joy

Bad Blogger...bad bad blogger....

Yeah I know - life is hectic and busy and full of crap...even more so when you are renovating...

When you say to yourself while in the middle of a renovation...

"Self you could save a few bucks if you do this project yourself"

DON'T LISTEN...seriously just don't....

So this past holiday weekend - DH and I decided to tackle the downstairs guest bathroom...really shouldn't have been so hard - new paint, a new sink and a new faucet...yeah well....

The room did get painted - along with lots of swear words tumbling from my mouth...and the sentence to TC "whatever we are paying the painters to paint upstairs is worth every single penny...I am NEVER painting again"

My thought was to put molding around the top...so we went to Lowes and picked it out...and well now I need to find a cool, funky border because cutting angles just ain't TC's thing....

And moving onto the sink...we got it sort of put together...well we got the faucet on the new pedastal sink...the sink however is still in two pieces in the garage...I have a distinct feeling that we will be having our contractor install the sink as orginally planned...

Painters are coming next week to paint our upstairs - the master bedroom, Rec Room and upstairs hallway...got all my craft crap out of my bedroom and actually sold my desk...now to start moving all the crap in the Rec Room...we have to have everything away from the walls - which wouldn't be such a bad thing if half the walls weren't covered by heavy bookcases filled with books, knick, knacks and other assorted junk...

Slowly but surely the renovation is moving along...

We have been taking some pictures - hope to post some soon...

On a sad note - my girls started SECOND grade this morning...seriously SECOND grade - they are growing up way way way to fast for me.....{sniff, sniff}

I am alive...barely...

thought I would pop in for a second and let my faithful readers (ha ha ha) know I am not dead...

when I have more time I will write more but just to give you an idea of what the last 10 days have been like...

• Head to Fl for vacation
• Go to the beach on Monday and despite putting on 40 SPF sunblock turn into a giant boiled lobster
• Have a huge Tropical Storm hit while you are there
• Have said Tropical Storm basically stall out right where you are staying - dumping 24 inches of rain.
• Try to escape Tropical Storm and flood your car causing you to get out and push it in knee deep water to some strange persons house and leave car
• Wait in white couch and Tchocki hell till the rain stops to see if your car even will start up
• Take lots of pictures as water creeps closer and closer to the house
• Thank god I brought perfume and a big canister of wet ones since the sewer flooded and we can only use "minimal" water (nevermind we can't really flush the toilets...ewwww)
• Have car not start up
• Have car towed and be told that most likely the engine is ruined based on what they have seen so far
• Tell TC I have PMS
• Have first Tchocki "murder"...poor clown with monkey - TW states it is an accident...has to go up in front of a judge (aka great grandma)
• Cry as insurance company tells you if engine is damaged most likely they would total your car because it is old and has lots of miles on it
• Cry tears of joy when repair place tells us all they had to do was drain the engine and change the oil and that it was a miracle we didn't sustain full engine damage
• ESCAPE Florida
• On way home from FL find out BIL, SIL and three kids are coming to our house for a visit - ASAP...
• cry, cry, cry as it is Wed and BIL, SIL and said three kids are still at our home

Yeah our vacation was an adventure all right...one I would like not to repeat - EVER...

Wham Bam Thank You Madam'

yep a quickie...

Life has been very very hectic - between regular summer stuff...recouperating from my surgery (I am still learning to take it slow because when I don't I HURT)...house renovations...planning for our vacation...

so it might be a little while before you see another post...we have 101 million little things to do before we leave for vacation...and uberplanner me is even letting this vacation slide...right now this is the plan

Friday evening - pack the car and drive return the following Saturday...

we really have no concrete plans other than to drive to FL, stay at my grandmothers for a few days and drive back...when will we get to FL??? When will we leave FL??? - who knows...we are hoping to stop in Savannah for a night...will we stop on the way down or on the way back...your guess is as good as mine...I figure as long as we have a credit card, enough clean underwear and our toothbrushes we are up for an adventure...

such is life...it's too short not to have an adventure every once in a while

I survived....

So I had my surgery last Friday and I am all fixed now…the Dr. stated that he does think it is that darn scar endometrioma – which would in fact put me in a rare group – since only 0.01 – 0.03% of women who have had a hysterectomy or a C-section wind up with this “situation”

Is it really bad of me to say “It’s because of you” when my girls ask “Why does your belly hurt mommy?” - I mean because if we are being honest here…it is because of them…well…really now I guess it goes back to TC fault really because

TC = sex = 2 fetuses (would that be feti??) = there is no way in hell 2 babies are passing through my va-jay-jay in the same day = C-section = scar endometrioma

Anyway I got a whole days rest, a new toilet and some kick-ass drugs out of the whole thing so I will call it a wash right now…

And no I am not currently under the spell of the kick-ass drugs…I did in fact write A NEW TOILET…

You see apparently when I go to a hospital my parents buy me a new plumbing fixture…

When I was in the hospital on bedrest while pregnant I came home to a brand new Insta-hot…

***Tanget – for those who don’t know what an Insta-hot is – it is a unit that goes with your sink so that when you push the lever you have instant hot water – it is one of those things that you can live without until you live with it…then it becomes a MUST HAVE item…I actually grew up with one in my house and when my mom came for a visit while I was in the hospital in pre-term labor she stood at the sink and asked TC where our Insta-hot was…ummm we don’t have one…well…later that day guess what my dad and TC tried to install….yes an insta-hot…and well 3 weeks, one electrician visit and a $150 fee it was properly hooked up :)

Anyway on Thursday night my parents, TC and I were talking – my dad got up and went to the bathroom and came back…the conversation went something like this…

Dad: When you are doing the remodel are you getting a new toilet?
Me: nooo why?
Dad: cause your toilet is sort of low and for us older folks it is sort of hard to crouch…
Me: STOP…images…bad bad images….stop talking please
Dad: I’m just saying a higher toilet would be nice
Me: Well stick a bow on one and leave it under my Christmas Tree

So off we go to the hospital on Friday morning at 6am for my surgery…yes 6 am…actually more like 5:50 because TC wanted to stop for coffee…yes he is so nice…let’s drink coffee in front of the woman who can’t eat or drink anything and has a hard-on for caffeine…I should have expected no less from the man who chowed down on fried chicken in front of his wife while she was in preterm labor for 10 hours and was not allowed to eat anything heavier than occasional ice chips.

Anyway – surgery went well and it turns out I was my surgeons last patient EVER…yep he retired as of last Friday afternoon – when was I told this – right before getting the sleepy juice…I just hope he saved his best work for last and wasn’t like…well shit I’m never going to be doing this again let’s just go the basic route…

Anyway got back home and got into bed and passed back out for a while…then I was awoken by loud banging…opened one eye and saw my mother…

Me: - what in gods name are they doing down there
Mom: Don’t take the lords name in vain
Me: it’s the drugs talking
Mom: They are installing the new toilet
Me: what??? (pass out again)

So now I don’t have a thing in my belly and I don’t have to crouch as much in my downstairs bathroom…

Next time they come I am going to set up the 13” TV for them to watch…maybe then I can have this conversation with my dad

Dad: Are you going to get a bigger TV
Me: nooo why?
Dad: cause your TV is sort of small and for us older folks it is sort of hard to watch the good parts of Real Sex on HBO…
Me: STOP…images…bad bad images….stop talking please
Dad: I’m just saying a bigger TV would be nice
Me: Well stick a bow on one and leave it under my Christmas Tree


Renovation News....

I am sure you all are waiting for updates with baited breath...

Guys came on Wed and put in my new storage cubbies and desk area in the rec room - I forgot to take a before picture...but I will be taking after pictures...and on Thursday they dug holes for the new piers that will support the three-season room...so next step is to get the holes inspected by the county and get the piers built and then they will be off building up the 3 season room...

In so much trouble.....

ok first - PERMITS have been pulled!!!! My renovation is underway...

We are meeting with the contractor today so he can introduce us to his guys that work with him and give him our first payment...

I am hoping things go fairly quickly from this point on...I guess I need to get my booty in gear and take a bunch of before pictures...

Secondly...OMG crafting is going to kill me financially - I swear...first off the fabric store I like to frequent has been receiving some new fabric...and it is beautiful....

They have CUPCAKE fabric...how freakin' cute is that....


I am so going to make myself a cute little purse out of that fabric....must not let the little ones see or else I will probably loose it fast....

and then this fabric...OH...what a great fall purse it would make


with this as the inside lining


or another option



and then there are the GNOMES - GNOMES people - cute GNOME STAMPS at Odd-Bird Planet - but I have to wait to see the whole line :( but just take a look at the sneak peek



you can check out her great other whimsical stamps at Odd-Bird Planet

I must have GNOMES!!!!!

question....at what point does a passing fancy become an obsession??? I mean am I goner because I have started to stalk the clearance garden gnomes at Target and other places... (not all for myself...as I like to give gnomes as presents...cause ya'know - every home needs a gnome)

BTW - wish me luck - I undergo my "abdominal mass" surgery tomorrow...I am stocked up - I have a bunch of books from the library to read...I have my favorite Tea-bags and Lipton Extra Noodle soup ready to go for TC to make for me...and I have a box of Starbuck Chai Tea chocolates hidden away in my nightstand drawer -

normally I wouldn't spend so much for a small box of chocolates but then again it isn't every day you get sliced open - right???

Two words - DRAG BRUNCH

yep drag brunch...

Where you can get a delicious plate of french toast with sauteed bananas while watching drag queens strut their stuff...

and that my friends was my Sunday morning

How was yours?

at least i have one more thing to cross off my Bucket List :)

Am I the only one who has a kid that is a freak?

SO TW can not wait to go back to school….

She has me marking each day off as we get closer and closer to Sept 2nd.

She whines and cries about how far away it is and can’t the summer hurry up so she can go back to school.

I bought her a summer workbook – full of math and science and language arts designed for kids going into 2nd grade…she is almost done with it.

This morning she asked if I could print her off some math worksheets for the weekend.

MATH WORKSHEETS…

What does PWG think of all this…she thinks TW is nuts too.

Just another typical Friday night...

Scene: Master Bedroom @ about 9pm

Me: Oh my God…that was amazing

TC: I know who knew that was possible

It is not what you think…let me play the conversation before those lines…

Me: You know we used to be cool people

TC: Yep

Me: We used to go out and party all night – hang out at the bar with our friends

TC: Yep

Me: Play some pool…you would play darts (I wish I could have played too but I was banned after and unfortunate incident involving a pitcher of Kamikazes, 2 darts and someone’s bare ass cheek)

TC: Yep

Me: We would dance like crazy fools all night…

{imagine me doing a little white girl shuffle while singing “Come On Eileen”}

TC: Yep

Me: and then we would leave the bar and stop at the deli on the way home and grab a Kevin Costner (turkey, tomatoes and alfalfa sprouts) and a big kosher pickle

TC: and then we had sex…

Me: Those were the days…now it is 9 pm on a Friday night and we are sitting in bed watching ‘When Animals Attack 2”

TC: we could still have that sex part

Me: Then we would miss the guy getting his head bit by the alligator

TC: you do have a point

Umm yeah I love going to the In-laws...

so very NOT!!!!

That is not to say I dislike my in-laws...separately they are very nice people...

Together - well imagine the Constanzas from Seinfield and the Barones from Everybody Loves Raymond had children....those children would be in in-laws...

the best conversation of the weekend was

MIL: Sometimes you are such a Baby

FIL: Sometimes you are an Asshole

Yes my FIL called my MIL an asshole...my SIL and I gave each other the look of "Did he really just call MIL an asshole???"

yes...yes he did

and how did the argument start...over the proper way to dry the dishes...

joy

and on to the colors....

OK so i have to pick out colors...this is what I have...

My 1st floor is very open without a lot of closed off "rooms" - right now we have a front sitting room (suppose to be a dining room) that is painted in the color dillweed (I must admit the name played a big part in chooseing the color - come on Dill Weed) - we are keeping this color

the rest of the house is a very very very light tan color and up stairs it is still builder off-white...

so our plan is to leave the sitting room the green dillweed color and paint the rest of the downstairs and upstairs hallway - Stone house


Except one accent wall (couch is up against it) will be in Rust

we also plan on painting the downstairs bathroom Rust too

Our bedroom we are thinking - Waterfall


we have a cathedrial ceiling in our bedroom with cherry color and satin nickel furniture - figured I would accent with chocolate brown (i.e. try and find a quilt with brown and similar colored blue)

and for our rec- room which also has a higher ceiling (not as high as our bedroom and it is a fairly large room - 2 car garage big)...something a little bright and cheery but fun and funky too - Summer Lime - soft yellow with just a hint of green???


What do you think...

P.S. - 25 more hours till I get to pick out my new cabinets...... {squeal}

2.5 more days....

til I get to pick out my new kitchen cabinets...

Now I have told you before that basically my new kitchen is like PORN to me...

Give me a Kraftmaid cabinet book and I am one SAT-IS-FIED individual...

So we meet on Wed afternoon - cabinets here...drawers there...

High back pull-outs....keep talking
Dual Trashcan Storage...oh baby
Pull out tray divider....YES....oh YES
Divided cutlery drawer....that's the spot...keep going
Dual Lazy Susan...yes yes yes yes yes yes
Flip out spice rack .....{high pitched gurgle}

and I'm spent....

Hopefully I can control myself during the planning...cause if I can't I'll leave "happy" in more ways than one...

Oh and the other day TC pushed me OVER the edge...I have been jonesing for a nice big Kitchen Aid mixer for oh about 14 years now...the cost has been too prohibitive - and TC has complained about the cost so I have tucked it away to the point where I just have learned to deal with my handheld mixer...well appearently TC learned that some of the models of the Kitchen Aid mixer allows for a meat grinder attachment... so let's see...TC is a hunter...who has a freezer full of deer meat...and likes homemade sausage...

If I am remembering it correctly it went something like this

"when you buy the Kitchen aid mixer make sure it is the model that can have the meat grinder attachment"

what....WHEN YOU BUY....

hells bells babies...I'm getting a new mixer, I'm getting a new mixer....

how sad that is all it takes to get me excited...

It's just a stinkin' dishwasher

Sorry I haven’t written lately – been up to my eyeballs in going-ons…

In addition to meeting with a general surgeon about the "unknown mass" that is currently in my lower abdoman and finally getting my sister married off last weekend with only a few minor problems (well ok some not so minor...like the caterer running out of food...to the tune of running out and still having 30 people not served yet...needless to say my parents aren't paying for ANY of the food...darn good thing they had a free-flowing open bar)

Last week we finally met with our contractor with his final budget numbers…looked at our wallet and said – no can do…so for the 132nd time our plans are being revised….

Goodbye breakfast nook addition…hello Three Season Room on current Deck area…

All well and good you say…

Yes and no.

See revising our plans means we now have breathing room in our budget…it means we are a good chunk of change below our budget…and here is the kicker – everything is a flat rate…so no surprises for us, meaning for our Three Season Room it will cost is X amount…no more no less…

Having breathing room in our budget is not a good thing…because I look around and think – well since we have extra room in our budget let’s do this and this and this…all little piddly things – like replacing the vanity in the girls bathroom, changing out the god –awful white and gold ceiling fan in our room, creating some shelves from dead space in our rec. room.

It means decisions…and now that we have extra $$$ floating around in our budget I am starting to rethink my appliance choices…

See the only thing I really cared about was my range…I am getting the mamma-jamma GE Profile double oven range…but the rest – the fridge and the dishwasher – as long as they were stainless I didn’t care…so I choose the lower end GE French door fridge…hey does it keep food cold – then that is fine with me…and for the dishwasher I choose a basic GE dishwasher…not the cheapest out there but not one that costs 1K either…

But now I wonder…maybe I’ll see how expensive the next model fridge is (which really only has a few differences – like they give you a wire can holder and the drawers on the side have clear fronts instead of all white plastic…) and then I started looking at dishwashers – thinking maybe I’ll go up to the next level…

Do you know how many stinken’ models of dishwashers GE has…really now...FORTY-SIX different stainless steel models of dishwashers...there really should be a law...each manufacturer should only have like 4 models available... $400, $700, $1000 and the I don't care what it costs because I light my candles using $100 bills...that way I can say give me the $700 and be done with it...in the price range I am looking at there are no less than 16 different models...oh the humanity...

In a few days I will be in a padded room and Dr’s will come by and ask “What happened to her” and all TC will be able to say is “I don’t know she keeps mumbling “dishwashers…dishwashers””

The real fun will begin next week when we kick off the plans with the all important “picking out the cabinets”…yes we are meeting with the cabinet guy and supposedly he can plot our measurements and we get to go to town…TC is coming with me – I’ll pretend to let him have a say but come on now…we all know I will be making all the choices…we did pick out the door style and color...well I picked it out and made it seem like TC had a choice - cause really after 14 years together you learn these sorts of things...how to make the man think it was his idea or decision...

So once we pick out the cabinets - what is going where, what pull out of other special features we want... we can set a timeline for the rest of the project so I am not without a kitchen for 3 months…

Oh yeah…during the middle of all of this I am scheduled to have surgery…on my abdomen. If everything goes alright I should only be down and out for about 4-5 days after the surgery but won’t be able to really pick anything up for 3-6 weeks – joy…So I will be busting my ass for the next 3 weeks to make a blitz through my house to get everything picked up and basically packed away before my house turns into a construction wasteland…and since we are redoing all the floors on the first level – this means EVERYTHING on the first floor has to be packed up…

Oh yeah and we plan to have pretty much every wall except for the girls room and the guest room painted…so we have to move everything away from the rec room walls (including a huge computer desk and a huge bookcase) and our Master bedroom (bed, dressers and oh yeah my ENTIRE craft area…)

So pray…pray that I make it through the surgery with flying colors and that I don’t have a mental break because I can’t decide which ceiling fan I like better.

As gas goes up....

my spending has become more frugal...of course we are getting ready to revamp our whole downstairs as well...so I have to become even more frugal.

I haven't always been great with money - saving and all that...then I saw an Ultrasound that had 2 babies on it...something like that wakes you up fast.

Last year my goal was to really set a GOOD budget for my family - to insure we had some money to pay the bills...some money to save away...and some money to have fun with.

A friend of mine passed along a great budget worksheet a few years ago and I haphazardly used it - then about a year ago I got strict and really sat down to figure out just where our money was going...and why we never seemed to "get ahead" when it came time to pay our credit card bills...don't get me wrong we were doing well when it came time to pay our credit card and we could pay the amount due but there would still be a few hundred $$ on it from charging for the current month...

My goal was that at then end of the month ALL bills would be paid - including the credit card in full...so that means if I pay the credit card on the 20th of each month then I have 0 balance on the 21st...

I found out a few things...like I figured our grocery bills were about $350...but they were closer to $400...that I wasn't factoring in the one night a week pizza/Chinese food/Mcdonalds - which was adding up to about $60 a month....the girls had started school and while the daycare bill was lower I was handing out $10 for this and $5 for that during the month for things for school...another $50 or so I hadn't accounted for...never mind a qucik trip or two to Target at about $30 a pop...so what i found was that over the course of a month I wasn't accounting for about $400 ... a nice chunk of change.

So I sat down and did out a budget...factoring in when certain bills fell and what months we might have "extra" breathing room in our budget...

Within 5 months we were credit card debt free...meaning at the end of the month all bills were paid up in FULL...nothing hanging over our heads for the next month... and better yet watching what we spent has in turn made us more frugal and we have actually managed to boost our savings quite a bit in the past 6 months...

So I am passing along the budget worksheet for you to use - it is totally customizable - put in your own numbers (oh how I wish that was our monthly income) and your own catagories...I try to account for everything during the month...but I don't plan out every little $ to a catagory because we all know things come up during a month and the flexabiliy allows me to add categories and budget items when needed (see the Goodyear bill category...)

Hope you find it useful - click on the link and choose download file...BTW it is an excel file so you will need excel to open it...It is safe :)

SIMPLE BUDGET WORKSHEET

A night in my life...

So last night TC went to bed early at about 9:30…I settled onto the couch after making yet another batch of chocolate starfish pops for my sisters upcoming wedding…only 2 more batches to go – yeah me…

So about 10:30 I see our dog Murphy “playing” with something out of the corner of my eye…I sort of see where it goes up in the air and then she catches it – I think nothing of it thinking she is playing with her ball…then she lays down and I hear noise…but not the squeak, squeak noise of her ball…

I get up off the couch to take a better look and see a big fat dead bird on my floor…

I scream which causes Murphy to snatch the bird up into her mouth and stand her ground…

I scream some more…and yell “TC…TC…TC” and TC isn’t coming – so I run up the stairs and scream some more…

TC finally wakes up and stomps downstairs…

TC: Geesh it is just a dead bird
ME: It is sooo disgusting and gross
TC: You could have picked up and thrown it away
ME: OH NO…I don’t touch anything dead except humans…and I get paid to do that

After the bird was disposed of I turned to TC and…

ME: nice to know if I was being attacked you would wake up and come to my rescue
TC: I would have woken up if Murphy was barking – why didn’t Murphy bark
ME: ummmm because her mouth was full of dead bird

And through all the screaming and carrying on the girls never woke up…crap something else they have inherited from TC…

Note to self: Try not to get attacked in own home when everyone else is asleep…

is the week over yet???

And yet the week isn’t over yet….

So last time I wrote I was without air conditioning and we had already been through 2 days of RECORD heat with more to come…

So Friday TC and I dropped the girls off at Girl Scout camp for the weekend after coming home early to meet with an HVAC guy…and excitedly ran out of the camp when the girls barely acknowledged our existence when we were leaving.

We ended up going to see the Indiana Jones movie as the thought of going back to the fiery pits of hell a.k.a our home did not appeal to us. Luckily when we got home it was cooling off so we managed to get some sleep.

Saturday we got up early and headed out…we managed to get a lot of things done as far as the house renovation goes – picked out countertops, appliances, cabinets, faucets. We also heard back from the HVAC guy – ummm pass – he wanted 9K AND told us it would be up to 3 weeks before they could install it…we managed to spend the rest of the day milling around here and there (I managed to snag some fabric at a yardsale for $1…the pattern is OK – I think I might make some simple totebags with it – to take to the grocery store and whatnot) and wound up at the $2 theater where we went to see Forgetting Sarah Marshall…funniest movie I have seen in a long time…if you are a fan of the Knocked Up – Superbad genre of film you will LOVE this one.

Got home Saturday night and quite frankly it was cooler outside then inside our home. I spent the night feeling like something was crawling all over me and trying to eat me alive…must have been having some flashback to the Indiana Jones movie (those that have seen it will know what I am talking about).

Sunday go and pick up the girls from camp and off to a BBQ at a friends house…an “inside” BBQ because it was too freakin hot outside for anyone to stand. On the way home we stopped at Target and bought fans…yep fans…

By some miracles of miracles TC and I were outside on Sunday evening in our front yard and a neighbor drove by…he stopped to chat and we told him of our misery and then bid him farewell – or so we thought…15 minutes later he shows up at our door with a heat pump motor – he just happened to have one at his house (I didn’t ask)…oh did I also mention he is an electrician by trade…15 minutes later sweet, sweet cool air is blowing through my vents…I owe him ALOT...

So we are living on borrowed air. We got 2 more quotes on Monday and think we have found the right company…who has an excellent reputation and is almost 4K BELOW the first estimate….see it pays to get multiple quotes….

One crisis averted…another takes it place….

So I have been having some pains in my lower belly for a little while now along the left side of my C-section scar – I had bad intense pain about 3-4 years ago that I went oto my GYN about and she preliminary diagnosed it as endometriosis…over the years the pain faded away except for occasional twinges here and there so it got pushed to the “back burner” as I dealt with lifes other issues–

Well it flared back up and it got more intense and consistent after a night of playing Wii Fit for an hour (stupid free step) last week…I HATE Dr’s – I can literally count on one hand the number of times I have been to the Dr for myself in the past 6 years…so needless to say I don’t have a primary Dr…a friend of mine gave me the name of a Dr and I called Tuesday…lo and behold they had a 3:45 appointment for Tues…so I go and get poked and prodded and told I might have a possible incisional hernia – great…

So he gets me set up with an abdominal ultrasound for Wed morning at the hospital and an appointment with a general surgeon for next Thursday.

Go to the US yesterday and good news is I don’t have a hernia…bad news is I have some sort of mass…not really sure what it is but whatever it is chances are it is coming out surgically…personally I am *thinking* it is Scar Endometrioma

Scar endometrioma is an uncommon condition following caesarean section. It presents as a lump on the caesarean scar and can often be painful.

In reading more about this I was surprised to find that in many cases patients who are ultimately diagnosed with Scar Endometrioma are preliminary referred to general surgeons for possible incisional hernias…things that make you go HUMMM - and yes the "uncommon" would be right up my alley...

So hopefully next Thursday I see where I stand…what is it? will it get removed? If it is removed will it come back?

Such an exciting upcoming summer…house renovations and surgery

Feeling Hot Hot Hot

It finally happened – we knew it would happen – we were foretold it would happen…

Our Heat Pump is dead…

The motor finally burned up on the hottest day so far this year…

Tomorrow it is supposed to be 100 degrees…

The thing about it though is we were planning on replacing the heat pump unit with our remodel – so we have to move it up a month or two no biggie right…

Problem is three months ago when we had the HVAC dude out and he told us the heat pump was on it’s last leg I asked TC to start researching for a new Heat Pump - to figure out what brand, tonnage, seer rating we want, need, desire…so when the motor finally did burn up we would know exactly what we wanted…

TC is a man…guess what hasn’t been done

Want to attempt to win something cool...

Check out Gretchen's Blog... Bananas and Toddlers

She is giving away a kick ass apron

A Tuesday quickie....

I can now show the other thing I made...

It was my first time attempting to make something like this - I think i did "OK"



It's a stroller blanket - made out of very soft white fabric on one side and some funky bright fabric on the the other side...

Wish me luck - tonight I have to sit through the 1st grade play - TWICE...they split the 7 1st grade classrooms into 2 separate groups and wouldn't you know my girls are each in a different group...so tonight I get to watch "GLOW" at 6:30pm and again at 7:30pm...JOY

Jumble of Thoughts

First off – I wonder if we can get Congress to pass some sort of bill standardizing Tooth Fairy money. The other day I was grilled by TW why she only got $1 for her first tooth and Matthew got $5 for his first tooth…umm I didn’t know really what to say so I told her maybe the Tooth Fairy had a good night at the slots before Matthews tooth fell out…

I propose $1 for the first tooth and .25 for each additional tooth…

While we are at it maybe add a rider so we are all on the same page when it comes to the Big Guy…you know Santa…1 or 2 gifts per kid – rest comes from family and friends…

Secondly – after volunteering at my daughters Field Day I am once again glad (for now) that I only have girls…I was in charge of “Dancing with the Stars” (Hollywood theme this year) and the boys…oh the boys…running, jumping over each other, attempting to break dance in the grass. I did learn 2 things – the Robot seems to be making a comeback…at least in the 8 and under set and apparently “Who Let the Dogs Out” is about fugly girls at a party? Listen to the lyrics…I had to about 15 times because that is all the kids wanted to hear…I tried to fast forward to “Cotton Eyed Joe” but that song made me nostalgic for a beer, a smoke filled bar and the year 1994.

Third – I made more purses…want to see them…well it is a rhetorical question because you are going to see them anyway. I also made something else but I can’t show that until the person actually gets the item :) The top three are ones I was commissioned to do...the bottom ones are the ones my daughters teachers are getting for their year end gifty.





I had to put my sewing machine away so I wouldn’t be tempted to make more stuff – I have a very busy week that involves sitting through the 1st grade play (TWICE – uggg), kiddie Dr. Appointments, hair appointments, baking a strawberry-rhubarb pie and packing the girls up for their 36 hour camping adventure this coming weekend

Forth – KITCHEN ON!!!!!! – we met with our contractor again on Friday and hammered out a few more things and the ball is starting to roll…TC and I are going to start looking at a bunch of little things and hopefully we can make some decisions without too much bloodshed on either of our parts– Granite, sink , faucets, tile, cabinet style, cabinet color, etc…..

Fifth – I got a ME ME ME day…I went to an all day stamp fest (another of my many hobbies) on Saturday and had a great time making a bunch of cards…I even won a great door prize – THESE stamp sets - Sushi by Stampendous


Aren't they stinkin' adorable...now to find time to ink them up and make a card...and if anyone can give me an idea for using the fish in the washing machine - that one has me scratching my head a bit - they were generously donated by Eclectic Paperie

That's all I got for now folks - over and out

umm yeah so it's FRIDAY!!!!!

about friggin time....

add in that it is a holiday weekend - no work on Monday - yeahhhhh

I will begin my weekend by going through 2 levels of hell...I told the girls I would take them to the fabric store with me...both of them.

Now going someplace with PWG isn't that big of a deal - she is pretty sedate and I can engage her in a conversation. If I ask her to sit and wait - she will sit and wait.

TW on the other hand, usually acts like she just ate a giant bag of poprocks washed down by 4 Red Bulls....here there and everywhere....all the while her mouth going a mile a minute.

Apart they are OK...together is a whole other ball game...it could work out that they are polite and actually listen to me...or it could go a totally opposite way of them "playing" WWE Smack-down in the middle of the Fleece isle.

Lord grant me the strength...

In other news I made myself a new purse



and I was awarded my 10 year award at work...my "gift" - an umbrella - I had about 5 things to choose from...I choose the one that might actually be useful at some point in my life...at least I get an extra hour of vacation a pay period now...

In case you are looking for time wasters this Friday here are some Blogs I love to peruse

Death Wore a Feathered Mullet (R - Mature audiences)
Toddlers and Bananas (G - General Audiences) - Gretchen is my Darth Vader
Mom-o-Matic (G - General Audiences) - Lotta just tells it like it is
My Pumpkin Pie (G-General Audiences) - Just about the cutest newborn you will ever see
Trees in OK (G- General Audiences) - if you are into running check out Tree's blog...myself - I think being eaten by a lion would be far less painful than running anywhere

Really...I blame it all on Gretchen

if Gretchen hadn't posted her oooo SEW crafty sewing projects on her blog I wouldn't be in this mess...

I am obsessed...with sewing now...in addition to the 101 million other crafty things I already have my hand in...

I can't wait for this weekend...why

because it is a holiday weekend? NOPE
because it is suppose to be in the 80's and BEAUTIFUL? NOPE

well then why then...

because the fabric stores are having BIG SALES....

and I must go...and buy more fabric...pretty fabric...precious fabric

Currently our sitting room has been turned into Jenni's sewing haven - with a 6ft fold out table and lots of scraps...

I told TC that I would clean everything up once I got the teachers year end gift of handbags finished...

I see now that I have probably infact lied to my husband....

The only consolation I have is my daughters are slowly loving my creations...they both want a bag to carry their Webkinz in...maybe I can turn it around...if they bat thier big eyes at TC and tell them mommy needs to make them a bag...then he can't possibly be mad my stuff is still all over long after I have finished the teachers bag.

right?

MULTI-TASKING MOMMA

I am a “do to mucher” – I always have been and always will be…I have over the years stifled my little “mucher” and have slowly backed away from always raising my hand when someone asks for a volunteer.

Does that mean I have any less to do?

Nope….I NEED something to do – it keeps me on track…gives me a purpose…

Last night – I got home from work – got dinner for the girls – went over their homework - took them to their make-up swim lesson – got home – made two loaves of strawberry bread and another batch of chocolate starfish (you’ll understand as you read below) - picked up the house a bit and made TC "HAPPY" :)

To that avail I am always juggling a bunch of projects and being the procrastinator that I am – means I always have something that needs to be done RIGHT NOW (or at least I think I do)

Add into the fact that I suffer from CADD…that would be Craft Attention Deficit Disorder. Yes, I readily start one project only to be swayed by another project I MUST DO RIGHT AWAY….so that leaves me with half finished projects.

The only way to get me to finish things is to give me a deadline…but even then sometimes the power is to strong…I see a pretty object and start scheming about the stuff I need to make said project.

Currently in production I have

• 5 crocheted scarves…a craft store was having a sale on yummy yarn for $2 a skein (normally $7/skein) so I had to buy a ton and a half - all the scarves are pretty much done – they just need the fringe added…something that would take all of 15 minutes per scarf…have I done it yet - nope…I envision that I will be using the scarves as holiday gifts this year so it gets pushed back
• 1 crocheted blanket…status ½ done – see I went to the Dollar Store about 6 months ago and they had gotten a shipment in of really cool and bright multicolored yarn and at $1/skein I bought a bunch and crocheted a blanket…a blanket that both PWG and TW fell in love with and take turns sleeping with at night…2 months ago I walked into another Dollar store and found more yarn…bought it so each of my girls could have their own blanket and I don’t spend 8 minutes every night hearing screetching “BUT YOU had it last night”…”No I didn’t you did”
• 25 3-D papercrafting swaps – yes 25 – I finally figured out what I am going to do – paper is cut – now I just have to assemble…oh yeah this HAS a due date…I have 2 weeks to get this done
• 25 cards – Well I don’t have to put these together I just have to design said card and cut all the materials for the card…card is designed – now to cut and cut and cut…like the 3-d items…I have two weeks
• 9 Girl Scout journals – see my girls Brownie leader is an Uber-leader and I think she might be slightly off her rocker because she is taking NINE 7-10 year olds camping for 2 nights…2 nights people!!!! And I don’t have to go with them. I volunteered to make each girl going a small journal – so she can write in it during the camp out. Project status – haven’t even begun…no wait – I have the chipboard and the Girl Scout paper…I have a deadline of 3 weeks for this project.
• 160 chocolate starfish lollypops – 160 people….if my sister ever gets married again I am not volunteering to make the favors…I swear…I did get the molds and I was smart and bought 4 molds of 4 each…so far I have made 2 batches – with a third sitting in my fridge as we speak…only 7 more batches to go…oh and her wedding is in a month…and then I still have to package each one in a cello wrap – tied it with the perfect pewter ribbon and attach a delightful little tag…
• A Few WHOO-HOO Chocolate Pops - Said Sister is having a Bachalorette party in two weeks and I am sending a care package with one of her bridesmaids since I can't attend (Girls weekend in the mountains of NC - it would take me 7 hours one way to drive) - I am making a WHOO-HOO pop for everyone...these are getting made along with the Starfish batches...so there are Orange and Dark Chocolate Whoo-Hoo's - I should be done with the Whoo-Hoo making tonight and be able to get the package in the mail Saturday morning...now lets hope they don't melt...nothing is sadder than a droopy Whoo-Hoo. Plus the fact they are sitting in my fridge and the girls keep asking if they could have one...ummm no...no 7 year old needs to be munching down on a Whoo-Hoo...so the sooner the Whoo-Hoos are out of my house the better :)

Now add in the fact that I just got a sewing machine and I am now addicted to all things sewing…I saw a picture of pretty little Key Fobs and now I feel the urge to make some myself…only I need to make them longer so I can use it as a Lanyard at work…cause right now I am using some god-awful yellow cast-off lanyard from a co-worker.

So I still need to add into the projects…

• a lanyard
• at least 3 cute tote bags with packs of cards for the end of the year teacher gifts
• plus PWG asked if I could make her a totebag to carry her Webkinz in

I keep this up I might one day be as cool as Gretchen

Shameless self promotion...

I just added some more cards to my ETSY shop...

CHECK IT OUT

Craftypleasures

Strawberry Fields Forever...

TW and PWG picking over fields and fields of strawberries...

Now what to do with the TON of fresh strawberries we have picked...already made my semi-famous strawberry-rhubarb pie and have a recipe for Strawberry bread...

Starting slow....

So I signed up for a Beginners sewing class...

biggest mistake of my life...I am such a pushover - I made this yummy, yummy bag

It's it A-FREAKIN-DORABLE - and so easy - basically you iron on the fabic to a piece of interfacing that has all the cut and sew lines...so easy a monkey can do it...

I dropped another $50 in the store after the class on more fusable patterns and luscious fabrics

I got home and worked on getting that brand new sewing machine out of the box and set up - easier than I thought - then I whipped up two more

the green and brown bag is simply delicious - I forgot to take a picture of the other one before I gave it as a gift...beautiful dusty teals and brown and cream stripes....ohhh ohhhh... and then there is more fabric I bought...aren't they just screaming out

SEW ME - oh baby SEW ME

Another chapter in the book of MOM

So the other day TC and I took the girls to Kohls to exchange some dresses they received from my MIL…the dresses were nice buuuuuuuut they had polo collars and my girls welll…they just don’t dig polo collars.

So anyway we started looking in the 7-14 section – I was AMAZED at the prices of the dresses…$40+ - now granted we were at Kohls so you knock off 30-40% - but still and forget trying to look for a simple cotton sundress – those apparently don’t come in sizes 7 and above.

As I started looking at the dresses a thought came to me.

Maybe I could make the girls some dresses myself (nevermind I JUST got a new sewing machine that is still sitting in the box because after reading the manual I am scared of it)

DING DING DING DING…

What the hell are those bells – why every time a woman turns a little more into her mother her mother gets an “I told you so” notch on her mothering belt

The moment I had that thought I was instantly whisked back to 1980 something…

Anyone remember JAMS shorts…

You know the butt ugly print shorts that EVERYONE had to have?

I wanted a pair…my mom took one look and said “Nope, to expensive but I will make you a pair”

And so she did…and when I complained there was no “JAMS” tag on the back…you know what she did…oh yes she sewed up a little tag that said “MOMS”…

After that incident I knew better than to ask for a Jimmy Z skirt…

Drunken Lemurs

Drunken Lemurs

Sort of sums up the place I go to almost every day for about 8.5 hours {wink, wink}

Did you know...

That it takes half a bag of chocolate wafers to make 4 chocolate Penis pops?

well now you do...

Childrearing in 2008

Scene: Driving TW to get her hair cut - stop at a red light - to our left is a cemetary

TW: Is that where Uncle John is?
ME: Now he is somewhere else.
TW: In our hearts right?
ME: Yes...

later on...

TW: How do people know how to get to Heaven when they die
ME: They just know somehow
TW: Do they use GPS?

Living with a Hunter - Take 2

I swear....

So DH was going Turkey hunting today...so he had all his stuff out in the garage...which he leaves out in open site...

What does PWG go and do...she "releases" all the turkey decoys from the bag...Appearently she felt they couldn't breath so she removed them all from the bag and situated them all around the garage...

Nothing scares you like opening up your garage door to a gaggle of turkeys.

OH but it gets better...

SO I took TW to run an errand and when we get back PWG and TC are doing something in the garden and PWG has something in her hand...

she puts it to her lips and blows and a horrendous sounds comes out

I soon learn it is a deer rutting call

TW is all over it so PWG gives it to her and says

"Blow it and I'll pretend I am a deer and daddy can shoot me"

ummmmmmmmmmmmmm

So TW blows it - PWG is on our neighbors lawn crawling around yelling "Shoot me Daddy...shoot me"...

to which after being egged on for a minute or two TC points at her and says "Bang"

PWG looks at him as says "You missed me"

ahhh just like reality....

So many things swirling in my head….

So this weekend I went to a convention for Mothers of Multiples…

Do you know what happens when 200 women are free from their kids and husbands for greater than a few hours…

MAYHEM…well old haggard mother mayhem

I do have to say Friday night was the most fun I have had in ages…it totally took me back to my college days…dancing on the floor with all my girlfriends…having drinks confiscated by hotel management (note if you bring a drink in from the “outside” dump it into a hotel glass – don’t keep drinking it out of a huge red plastic cup).

There was something in there that involved me, a stage, my friend R, light up electric flame candles in my bra and I do believe I did grab my crotch….oh yeah I was also singing along to “Like a Virgin”…. There was some talk of R and I recreating the Madonna/Brittney MTV kiss but we restrained ourselves…I think the crotch grabbing was enough…Like I said Total MOMMY Mayhem…it was {unfortunately} caught on tape for all of eternity…I so need a copy of the tape because in 8 or so years when my girls start yelling that I am uncool or don’t know how to have fun I think their punishment will be to watch their mother grab her crotch on stage while her breasts are glowing…

However, later that evening my friend Deb did the most hysterical interpretive dance to Ozzy’s Crazy Train I have ever seen…It was sort of like if Animal from the Muppets had gotten Tasered….or for those of you who have had the pleasure of seeing Barnyard…she was totally Wild Mike. I swear I might of have leaked a little I was laughing so hard….the pinnacle of the dance involved her throwing herself down on the stage and doing something she calls “Fish out of Water”…now let me tell you that Deb is probably all of 4’10” and has some HUGE mammeries on her…. So there she is flopping all around the stage….That too was recorded on tape for all of eternity.

But it gets so much better because at some point someone decided we Mommies must drink and dance some more…so what did we do – we went to a bar – there were about 10 of us and we had a great time – when we arrived at said bar the dance floor was empty – but not for long….I dare say we brought the party because about 15 minutes after we all arrived that dance floor was packed.

I somehow made it back to the hotel…and today Wed. is the first day I feel normal again…when I woke up on Saturday morning I felt like I had swallowed a sock and the first words out of my mouth was “I will never do that again”…

Ummm yeah only 365 more days till the next convention – YEEE HAAAAA

********************************************************************
In other news....PWG was voted Most Caring in her class...I am so proud

I am running away...

and I may never come back...

This weekend is my annual Mothers of Multiples convention...it is a regional convention of which about 20 or so clubs gather for a weekend...

Imagine if you will about 200+ mothers of twins, triplets OR MORE all in one place....

There better be some damn nice mattresses and some free flowing alcohol....cause 48 hours aways from the kids...all anyone wants to do is sleep and drink...seminars be damned...

I have to say, lately, being a mom sort of sucks...

I mean you are sort of prepared for the non-sleep, spit-up, messy diaper period that is babyhood...everyone warns of the "terrible twos" but no one to date warned me about the

SUCKTASTIC SIXES (and SEVENS)

seriously my girls are driving me nuts....the 'tude is really off the scale...with all the "I don't have to do what you say"... the "I don't wanta's"...the whiney "but everyone else gets to..." and then the gimme's....I swear ask them to do a simple task and the response is "Whatcha' going to give me"

Add in asking them to do the same thing 101 different times - only to wind up doing it yourself...

Seems I am not alone either - in a discussion with my PIM's (Pyscho Internet Moms) who all have children about the same age as mine are dealing with some of the same issues...

so what does that do to a person - turns them into a very yelly mom...

and I don't like being a yelly mom

My co-worker and I were discussing our kid problems and she told me she was on strike...YEP on strike - seems this past Monday she had had enough and decided to go on strike - that she was tired of telling her kids time and time again to do something or remind them of something only to not have it done...HOWEVER...she did not get yelly...oh no - she said in her house growing up she and her sister didn't really pay attention when her mom yelled at them....but when her mom cried that is when they knew her mom meant business...so she in effect channeled her mom and cried...and cried and told her kids she was on strike...

I asked a friend with older twins why no one warns you about the Sucktastic Sixes...she said it is because they are to busy dealing with the Egotistical Eights to warn those behind them...

joy...something to look forward to

Well I did it....

I FINALLY got a few things listed in my Etsy shop - Craftypleasures

and I got my first sale too :) - thanks a bunch Gretchen (of GretchenCrafts )

It will be slow growing over the next two weeks as I put some finishing touches on a few things in progress and currently a friend of mine has most of my cards and giftables with her as she is participating in a craft fair this week and asked if I wanted her to try and sell some of my stuff - ummm heck yeah!!!

I am happy to take custom orders - so if you see something you like but it is already sold...or you need something specific just let me know....

when your SO is a hunter....

When I first meet TC I had no idea of the sheer magnitude of his love for hunting...part of it might have been the ban against firearms in dorm rooms...

As we started getting serious I got a peek into the madness that is hunting...

Now I must confess I did take a shooting class in college...which I took with 4 of my sorority sisters...(after which the teacher made a ruling stating no more than 2 sorority sisters per any one of his classes...I have to admit that was a wise decision on his part cause 5 giggly girls with firearms is a bit of a hazard...) - when TC and I were living in sin he joined a shooting club and on occassion I went with him...

oh yeah the rush of something long and hard in your hands...anyway I digress....

Anyway I soon learned my scheduale would be arranged around hunting seasons...deer, turkey, other small rodent like creatures...and for the most part I don't mind...

The thing is now that we have Uber-cable and now have access to 27 different outdoor and hunting type channels TC can fuel his hunting madness basically 24/7...and that is rubbing off on the girls...

The other day I came home to TC and the girls sitting watching TV...

Spongebob - Nope
Hannah Montanta - Nope
iCarly - Nope

but rather some hunting show where they were going after bears....

so the guy has this poor bear lined up in his sites and I hear a little voice saying "Shoot...shoot....shoot" and then the poor bear falls to the ground and I hear the same voice saying "Yeahhhhhhh"

I look over and see PWG pumping her little fists in the air

Seriously....I asked her if she understood the poor bear was dead...she looks at me with those blue eyes and says "no they didn't Daddy told me it's all pretend"

I just didn't say a word....

BTW - if you have ever had reason to come across a "Hunter Dan" doll (see picture above) TC bares a freaky resemblance to the doll - goatee and all...to wit we currently have 2 Hunter Dan dolls in our midst...they usually hang out with the Barbies (and never turn thier backs on Ken {wink, wink}) The one of the best scenes ever was PWG with about 6 NAKED barbies all fanned out in a semi circle...while she "walked" a Hunter Dan doll around them...I asked "What are you doing" - her response "He's looking for a girlfriend"

****************************************************************
Hunting conversation from the dinner table

PWG: Daddy, have you ever killed a rabbit?
TC: Yep
PWG: what about a squirral?
TC: Yep
PWG: Yeah Mommy's killed one too...she hit it with the car and then said "Oh Crap"

Karma's a Bitch

Yesterday morning as I was getting ready for work I heard commotion downstairs…

TC was yelling raising his voice at PWG.

I go downstairs and ask what all the fuss was about

TC: I gave PWG a pair of socks like a minute ago and now she can’t find them.
ME: and
TC: How do you loose a pair of socks in a minute’s time?
ME: She’s six…what do you expect…she has the attention span of a goldfish.
TC: She really needs to pay attention.
ME: whatever.... remember one day you'll be old and decript and forget where you put things

Fast forward to last night…after dinner TC got changed so he could do some yardwork…he came downstairs with a pair of socks in his hand {you know where this is going right?} I was enjoying being read to by TW who was telling me all about the making of Mt Rushmore.

About 2 minutes later out of the corner of my eye I see TC roaming about the downstairs

ME: Whatcha doing?
TC: {grumble, grumble} Looking for my socks
ME: Didn’t you JUST have them a minute ago
TC: {grumble, grumble} yes
ME: like daughter, like old father

Don't forget to play along to LAST Fridays Fun - there are still a few quotes that haven't been guessed...and if you put movie quotes in your blog let me know and I will link ya up :)

and what did Heather win...

THIS will soon be on its way to Heather....




From left to right...

• A cute decorated wooden box...perfect to brighten up a desk - use it to hold pens, pencils, Hershey Chocolate sticks...
• A 7 x 4 decorated journal...the front quote is one of my all time favorites "Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans" - a cute place to jot down things you want to remember
• A chipboard coaster calendar (yes I am aware it is already April) - one side has space for a 3x3 picture - a nice way to brighten a desk
• A set of 6 Birthday cards...you can NEVER have too many birthday cards...what i like baout this pack is they are universal...great for a man, woman or a child...you can see a little bit better picture of all the cards by clicking HERE

I am estimating a grand opening of my Etsy store hopefully by next Monday....

And the candy goes to.....

the Random Number Generator choose number 6...

and that is....
HEATHER

who said...
Who wouldn't want some of your fabulous craftiness?!
I like
Sarah and the Goon Squad
Oh The Joys
Iowa Avenue

YEAHHHHHHHHH

Stay tuned I'll be posting a picture later this weekend so EVERYONE can see what Heather won :)

Some Friday Fun!!!

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the DREAM is dying a slow death....

Remember my post about my soon to be orgasmic new kitchen....My New Porn

wellllll....maybe not so orgasmic...

I have spent the past week crunching numbers and figuring out if we can really do what we want to do...basically adding on a big addtion to the back of the house with a brand new big pantry/laundry room and huge new kitchen...the answer is yes...but with a huge problem

We could do what we wanted but it would leave us very little wiggle room in our budget to do anything else for the next 15 years or so....like going on a nice vacation every once in a while...or being able to afford a newer car in a year or two...we would in effect be house poor...

So last night TC and I sat down and talked about revamping our plan...oh don't get me wrong I'll still get a new kitchen...only it won't be as big - with a big huge island and TC won't get his man room....

So the new plan is something like this -

We would have the money to have a nice kitchen - albeit with the same floor plan but with the appliances I really want and the nice Armstrong flooring we really love and the to die for granite countertops....

We would have the money to convert the idea of a screen porch into a 3 -seasons room that would give us extra living space and a room for TC Poker nights with the guys...

We would have the money to buy really nice vinyl replacement windows that will last for a lot longer than "budget" replacement windows and maybe even afford the hot-diggidy-bomb Pella - with the blinds inside- windows for our bay window...

We would have the money to really make our Bonus/Rec room a lot nicer - big screen TV with surround sound, big plush lounging sofa, nice storage cabinets.

and there might even be a little money in the budget for a tummy tuck for me....

I especially like the last part...

***Don't forget to post a comment on my BLOG CANDY post

BLOG CANDY!!!!

Who wants some sweet treats….

Some of you may know and others may not…but I tend to be a little crafty…Scrapbooking and stamping is my hobby. I really enjoy making things – family scrapbooks, handcrafted cards, small giftables, etc…I like to think I do a pretty darn good job and at least a few people think so as well because they actually buy some of my items. I have a separate crafting blog set up – Stamptopia. However it gets neglected far more than this one.

I am actually in the process of setting up an Etsy store called CRAFTY PLEASURES …I am hoping that I will have a few items in my new shop by early next week…

What does this have to do with my BLOG CANDY?

Because one lucky person is going to get a sampling of items that will be featured in my shop!!!!

Yes yes shameless self promotion of me and my new shop…

So what do you have to do to get in on the action…

Leave a comment

But just don’t leave any comment…I am always on the lookout for a fun, new blog to read…so leave me a comment and let me know what your favorite blog to waste time …and don’t try to suck up and say mine :)

I will use the RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR on Friday at about noon EST to determine who the winner of my BLOG CANDY is - and post it here :)

*Note if you post as Anonymous please put your first name or initials in with your comment…if an anonymous wins we’ll find a way to get in contact :)

Good luck to all

BLOG CANDY!!!!!!

OK all....I am getting close to 10K views...know I know I check my blog out a lot but it must mean that someone other than myself is viewing a glimpse into my life...

Here is the deal...tomorrow I will be telling you all about the BLOG CANDY I will be giving away...what will you have to do...well I will tell you tomorrow :)

Delving Deeper into Mommydom

So last night while TW was digging through her notebook she told me she had something for me…

Uhh OK

And so she handed me a note…

What did said note say.

Deer Mom and Dad.

Please let me git my eers pirced. Everyone else has theer eers pirced.

Oh yes – it has begun…

EVERYBODY ELSE HAS….

Once again I figured we had some time before the gimmees and wants and the EVERYBODY ELSE GETS TO…came on strong…

But I was wrong and confronted full face last night…all written up in 1st grade grammar and writing.

My response was “well I am sure not EVERYONE has their ears pierced”

To which TW responded…”Oh yes – Riley, Laura, Katie, Jenna all have their ears pierced”

And I said “Well PWG doesn’t have her ears pierced” {to which PWG girl piped up and stated she didn’t want her ears pierced}

And in response I got “PWG doesn’t count – she isn’t included with EVERYONE” – out of the mouth of babes…

So of course I responded with the question that is encoded in every mommies DNA

“If all your friends jumped off a cliff would you”

And TW with her smark-alec self said “No – that would be stupid – what does that have to do with getting my ears pierced”

Ummmm nothing….

Anyway the answer was NO…I told her maybe in a few years…but for now I have enough to deal with and quite frankly I don’t think someone who can’t even remember to flush the toilet 60% of the time is ready for the responsibility of pierced ears…

When I need a laugh...

One site I like to frequent is called BEST OF CRAIGSLIST

It is a cumulative spot where well the best postings of Craiglist can be found...in some cases it is items people are looking to sell...in other cases they are mindless rants that make soda shoot out of my nose as I giggle too hard...

some of my favorites from the past few months - (just click the link - sit back and enjoy)

PINK VAGINA COUCH - in all actuality it looks quite comfy - it would probably be the perfect addition to any lesbian home.

CARTON OF IRREGULAR CAT HATS - ummm anyone else going for the theory the cat committed suicide?

GRANNY PORN - just one word EWWWWWW....

ON THE PROWL - some people just don't have standards....

FARTING DOG - this one had tears of laughter coming from my eyes

CONCEITED PENIS - daymn

There are many many many others....so go goof off and read :)

Happy Thursday!!!

Freedom...sweet freedom

It is Spring Break this week – and you know what that means…

NO HOMEWORK….

That is right – no hassling my kids about their spelling lists…no having to sit there for 20 minutes listening to some insane kids book…no projects…no math homework…

Yeah for ME!!!!!

Yeah sure it is Spring Break for the kids – but come on let’s face it 1st graders don’t do their homework alone…they want mommy or daddy right there to help them…

Although they have gotten better over the past year and manage to do 50% of their homework on their own now (VS 0% the first 2 months of school)– we still have to look over their homework and decipher what their sentences say…

ME: PWG…what are you trying to say in this sentence “I lik too eet big peenuss”
PWG: I like to eat big peanuts
ME: OH…well let’s get that eraser out and fix some spellings…

Don’t even get me started about the lovely drawings of “peanuts” she did with PEENUSS spelled above it…you have imaginations - use them…

Granted 1st grade homework isn’t that hard…but you try telling an OCD – perfectionism rules child, such as TW is, that she made a mistake…oh all hell breaks loose…I will admit more than once I have let something go that I know was wrong just so I don’t have to deal with the whining and the frustration coming from a 50lb shedevil-child – after all we are supposed to learn from our mistakes, right?…and college ain’t going to be looking at 1st grade transcripts.

Last night I got home and looked around and felt so relaxed…no rushing to see who has what homework…so trying to listen to 2 kids read their books out loud while trying to prepare dinner…no last minute wails of “I forgot to do XYZ and I need to do it for tomorrow” as we are tucking them into bed…

I giggle with anticipation for this evening….

VIVA LA SPRING BREAK!!!!

Because the roofer peed I got new shoes....

Last weekend we had high winds here on Friday and Saturday...

I was at the twins yardsale Friday night and all day Saturday...get home about 5pm on Sat and notice a hella' bunch of shingles on the driveway...

Get inside and TC tells me he has contacted our roofing guy (who we had out last year to repair our leaky roof and last month during the last wind storm to replace a few shingles from the front of the house) and he would come out to take a look in the morning...I really start freaking because the last time we had him out to replace like 3 shingles on the front of the house it cost us $125 and there was a whole huge patch missing this time (F'n wind) - I calm down a little when I realize we actually have a little wiggle room in our budget this month...

So 9AM on Sunday morning (really 8 am to me...) I wake up to the dog barking ... go downstairs and find TC talking with the roofer...then the roofer leaves....hummm

So TC tells me that the roofer will be back but we have a problem...Turns out roofer guy jumped our fence .... TC didn't even know he was at our house until PWG piped up and told him someone was in our backyard!!!!

So TC gets up to look out the window and realizes roofer is taking a leak behind our shed...Now our backyard is WIDE open...many other homes can see directly INTO our backyard because thier houses sit higher and the lot behind ours is the drain field on the cul-de-sac - so NO cover...

TC is livid and goes out to have words and explain that peeing behind our shed is NOT appropriate and that we have young girls...the guy apologizes and says he had a lot of coffee - TC tells him that he could have knocked and used our bathroom with no problem...and the fact that he jumped the fence our dog could have attacked him (ha ha ha more like licked him to death) - but still (we do have Beware of dog signs)

So the guy is very apologitic and says he realizes we are good customers and that he will fix our roof for free. TC tells me he thinks we shouldn't ever hire him again...I point out that the guy came over on a freakin SUNDAY morning to fix our roof...

So anyway the guy had to leave to get the right shingles and comes back about 11am...to which we get 2 calls from neighbors wondering how the hell did we get someone to come and fix our roof on a Sunday morning...

Needless to say when I called home at 2pm (the girls and I had to go to a girl scout cookie booth sale) TC told me the roofer was still in the neighborhood fixing his 4th house for the day.....seems once he was done with ours - he went to our two neighbors and then someone saw him working on our neighbors house and well...who knows how many more he might have done as he worked his way further into the neighborhood...

So yes he did fix our house for Free...but somehow I think he more than made up for his "loss"

So on Monday in the mail we get the Kohls flyer - I will readily admit it I am a Kohls whore...especially around Clearence time...and it had one of those - 15-20 or 30% off things on the front cover...so I slowly peel the sticker away to reveal a 30% off - good for this Thursday through Sunday.....

Whooo Hoooo

Now that we don't have to pay for the roof to be fixed we can certainly spend some of that "wiggle room" money - Momma needs a new pair of shoes...

However...karma is a bitch...

I am currently living on 3 hours of not so good sleep...ended up taking PWG to the ER at 3am this morning - she had started complaining at 7pm while we were at Kohls that her tummy hurt - we asked all the pertinent questions and just thought it was a small tummy ache and it would go away as she slept...

Well she moaned most of the evening while sleeping...wound up in my bed at about midnight...at about 3 she really started whimpering and I felt her tummy again and it had a hardness to it so I told TC I would take her to the ER - while I was getting dressed she puked (luckly into a trash can)

so from 3 until 6 we were at the ER with a few more puking incidents (one of which occured while she was on the pot...she leaned over and puked right in her underwear between her legs...needless to say I just threw those away)

Got the diagnosis of the stomach flu with a slight UTI...joy...

the Dr. wished us luck and mentioned that anti-nasuea pills he prescribed SHOULD an adult need to take one to take the whole thing and not split it in half...double joy on that...

So now every little twing in my stomache is making me think "Am I next?"

where did I put my apron - I think I need my tequila now...

Gin in my Apron Pocket....

well I am back on the wagon...well so to speak...

Thanks to Lotta last year I joined the MILF club - you know Mothers I'd like to (you know you know)

I will admit that I weigh the same this year as last year...{head hung in shame}

BUT I am about ready to start WW again (third times the charm right?) - It has worked for me in the past and I am no where near the weight I was when I FIRST started WW a number of years ago...

Anyway since alot of people involved in the MILF group have found thier lives have taken different paths - Lotta has decided to start a new group - Gin in my Apron Pocket

Although I do hold the right to replace the Gin with Tequila...after all a Margarita isn't a Margarita without Tequila (and triple sec and lime and salt)

so I am taking on the group to better myself this year...I have goals...little goals but goals nonetheless

• Loose 20 lbs
• Actually go on a family vacation this year
• Work on getting an Etsy shop up and actually running...need something to pay for all my craft clutter
• Say F' it and let my girls have ice cream for dinner every few months
• Try not to stress out over our possible kitchen remodel
• Hide the Tagalongs so PWG won't find them and eat them all...{I bought them for me!!!}
• Blog more often...let's see small steps - say 2X's per week at least
• Actually leave comments on the peoples blogs I read :)

So that's about all I have for now....